“A man’s errors are his portals of discovery.”
~ James Joyce
First a big thank you. I have bought both the dollar guide and the course for $99. They have changed my perception not just on girls but on life especially with the “be the best man you can philosophy”. I have been living in the dark ages till then.
However! I would just mention one bad experience. I became very pro-active with one girl in my office. We lunched and she became open friendly and yielding. We frequently went to lunch and became close. However as she was going to be absent from the office for 6 months we did not my mutual consent take matters further although remained very close. In the last two days at the office though she hit me with a major sh*t test. She became cold and pre-occupied. I rode this out with smiles and gentle comments and with an hour before she was due to leave she gave me a smile that would have melted an Arctic icecap.
But I flunked it Jennifer. In that moment I resented what I felt was manipulative and controlling behavior. So I didn’t say goodbye and avoided her. I sent her an email saying I was sorry to miss saying goodbye but she did not respond when she frequently had done so before. Now I feel as though I have behaved foolishly and perhaps hurt her.
It goes to show how careful you must be with sh*t tests. But do you have any sympathy for my initial reaction based on what I thought was flaky behavior from her?
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Ever just done something with a woman and then later when thinking about it – just wanting to cringe at what you did? Well, I get emails from you guys all the time with moment like these that you wished you could take back. Here are two readers who have dug themselves into a bit of a hole and here are my solutions on how they can get out!
Ok so ive had this crush on this girl for about nine months. She was with this guy and then they had problems, the broke up then tried to work things out but just within the last 2 weeks they decided to be done for good. Well i finally got the nerve to ask her into a relationship by saying, u know i really like you so when u feel like u can be in a relationship again could we give it a chance. She said let me get on my feet and heal a little bit. I said ok and didnt say anymore about it.
I’m fairly confident that she does need time to heal but Id like a second opinion. Also does this always mean what it says or is it a way of saying no.
Thanks alot, C
Ok, so I’m going to tell you exactly how I see it. Click here to read more »
A reader asks …
I am getting kind of confused with how to deal with this “sh*t testing.” It seems like it would be hard to find that balance between being an understanding and “not taking the sh*t from the girl.”
At the understanding side, someone could take that too far and end up being a door mat. But, on “not taking the sh*t from the girl” side, someone could take that too far and come across as insensitive of what the girl is going through or why she is reacting in that way. Thanks again,
Matt, I would say that you really need to assess the situation. I can’t give you a manual on all the situations a woman will engage in that will indicate that she is sh*t testing you. The action could be the same – yet the intention she has for it could be different. This is where you are really going to have to use your judgment.
It’s not a matter of, “Why is she really sh*t testing me” and more of a matter of, “How do I choose to respond to this?” If you always choose to respond with presence – you will win 100% of the time. Click here to read more »
So many of you may know about shite tests. Tests that women put you poor guys up to .. so you can prove that you are worthy to talk to, date and all that other stuff =)
Well I have read a lot of posts about this. And I want to be able to put the solution to these tests in a different light.
So many posts have come out, giving examples of what you should say and what you shouldn’t say.
I love reading these posts, but I think that they defeat the main point.
And that is … understanding the “reason” why you need to respond in the way that you do.
So as you can see in my heading, I say that you can win these tests, by giving women exactly what they want.
That may cause a little bit of controversy because all the other posts give strict rules like “never answer her question directly”, “never say no or yes” and the rest of it.
Well I want to go against the grain of that. And say that how you pass those shite tests really depends on the situation and what is being said.
If you want to know how to pass these tests, then you don’t need to know and study all the shite tests that have been given in the past and try and come up with answers to all of them. Click here to read more »