Hot Alpha Female

“A pedestal is as much a prison as any small, confined space.”
~ Gloria Steinem

Now, if this was a “pick up” blog I would be saying, “Why have one girl when you can have 10?” And, then proceed to tell you all the benefits of what having 10 girlfriends would be. But for anyone who has actually had more than ONE girlfriend at a time, the reality is it creates more problems than it does benefits. But that is besides the point, because the point is that the majority of you are looking to get the interest of ONE particular woman.

So, here is the best way in which you can attract that one woman into your life. First, it’s your (good old) mindset. It’s your attitude and your inner game. Now, I know this is the boring answer and I know that some of you just wished for once I would say, “Here is this bright shiny blue pill and if you just take it, the girl of your dreams will be in your arms and you will live happily ever after”. But as you know, life let alone dating women is not like that – AT ALL.

So, yes, it’s all about your mindset baby! In fact, there are complete programs out there that ONLY focus on helping you develop the mindset to attract and keep a woman in your life. And, if it’s good enough for them, then it’s good enough for you. So let’s get to it!

You know what makes a fantasy so appealing? The fact that it’s a fantasy! And, usually the basis of any fantasy is intense focus on only ONE SIDE of the equation. And, as you know life is always working in balance. So, it’s not that the balance doesn’t exist, it’s just that the fantasy prevents you from seeing the other side. If you could see what you want from a balanced perspective, then you would take the fantasy off it’s pedestal and more than likely set a realistic plan to accomplish your goals which YOU BELIEVED was possible.

Which brings me to this idea:

Most of you guys say that you want to get that one special girl, but MOST of you don’t believe that you really can get her.

Some of you don’t believe you are worthy to get a girl like that. Some of you think that you are going to need to work extra hard and be super perfect to attract a girl like that into your life and to keep her there. Click here to read more »

In 2005 Steve Jobs did a speech to a huge cast of college graduates. What he shared with them were some principles which were potentially life transforming.

There was one in particular that I truly connected with. And, it’s one that I believe will help you over your FEARS when you feel like: everything is on the line.

Perspective changes our world. And, that changes everything.

Hot Alpha Female

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love & affection.
~Buddha

I know “that” woman you are talking about. Ok, maybe not personally, but I know that you think she is the one woman or the one kind of woman that would really make all your dreams come true. Maybe she is uber hot. Maybe she is seriously sexy. Maybe you think you would have a killer connection with her. Fill in the blanks however you please.

Whether it’s a celebrity fantasy like Kim Kardashian, Angeline Jolie, Megan Fox or Jessica Alba; or it’s the girl next door; the girl at work; the best friend who you want to get to know in the “other way” – the same question keeps coming up.

“How do I get a girl like “that” to date a guy like me?”

Which is usually followed by a whole bunch of reasons your “mind” makes up which disqualifies you from dating a woman like this. In fact, the mind is a very powerful thing. And, even if a woman like “that” was interested in you – with that current mindset either you wouldn’t see it, or you would sabotage the process so a girl like “that” would eventually lose interest in you.

Now, I’m not going to go on another rant about how important mindset and self esteem is when attracting and dating good quality women (or maybe I am). I would suggest that if you can’t relate to any of what I’m saying – it’s probably because you have grown beyond this point. Congratulations. For everyone else .. keep reading. Click here to read more »

“An emotionally immature woman has no sense of awareness of what she is doing. She is on autopilot. She is in constant reaction to her emotions to her needs and wants.”
~Hot Alpha Female

Alright, I really do need to talk to you about something. There seems to be a huge fixation getting the likes and attention of a particular woman or that hot chick. If you have read my other posts <here>, <here> and <here> you will know the warnings I have about many hot chicks. I’d say I was sorry about bursting your bubble, but I’m really not. I don’t want you guys to make the same mistakes most other guys make.

There are reasons why guys are attracted to women who look hot. Some of the reasons have to do with symmetry being a possible indicator of fewer genetic problems. Other reasons may have to do with youthful qualities about the face or body appearing to be associated with fertility. Whatever the reasons, I would strongly encourage you to think about your decisions with your BIG head, not your little head.

Most of you will come to conclusion of: “I like this chick and I want her now!” And, don’t give it much more thought than that.

There are women who are average looking who can be wonderful partners or dates. But, let’s get real. Even average looking women can cause problems. So, let’s talk about screening out women who might fuck up your life. Hot or not.

Click here to read more »

“Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it. You can make more money, but you can’t make more time. When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back. Your time is your life.”
~Rick Warren

Let me set the scenario. You meet a girl and you are in the process of getting to know her. Maybe you have had a couple of conversations. Maybe you have been on a couple of dates already. Maybe she is your friend that you would really prefer to get out of the friend zone with. And, the kicker is: You don’t know how to take attraction with her to the next level. You don’t know from how you can go from being the friend or the guy is going on dates with to girlfriend. You don’t even know on how to get going in that direction.

So, here is a tip that I want all of you to remember. Sometimes the reason it’s so hard for you to see how to move the relationship forward is because you are so scared of screwing it up. You want to do the right thing. You want to do the thing that is going to work. You want to push her off the fence, without having to do any work.

I can understand that. Of course you want to do what works. Of course you don’t want to rock the boat. But it’s that very psychology which will trap you in dating (limbo) and the friend zone time and time again.

Guys that get the girl are fence pushers. They escalate. They move forward. They face the risk of things not always going their way. They do what they want and NOT what they think she wants.

So, now I’m going to share with you a way that you get off that fence. Where you can put the control back in your hands and end the insanity. It’s simple, it’s proven, and it works. Click here to read more »

“Men acquire a particular quality by constantly acting in a particular way.”
~ Aristotle

So, for those of you that have been following me for a while, you would understand that I put particular emphasis on developing skills like: presence, assertiveness, and strength. What I often get asked is HOW to display this on a daily basis, particularly during interactions with women.

First,  let me say that by displaying such skills comes from working on something “inside” rather than focusing on something the “outside”.  It also doesn’t necessarily come from just doing a whole bunch of random things differently. It comes from selecting specific and particular areas of yourself and your life and masterfully putting the right pieces together.

So, what I’m saying is that developing these qualities is like art. It takes a level of skill, finesse, and experience to bring all different components of your life together. So, for those of you that are coming from a quick fix mindset of “developing presence” overnight – then you have come to the wrong place because something this great takes a little time, a lot of courage, and some serious application.

With that little disclaimer in mind,  let’s continue on with one way you can start developing your presence. I’m sure you have heard a lot about the term self-discipline and all the fancy definitions of it. What I believe to be the true definition of self discipline is holding yourself accountable. In  a sense, it’s making and keeping certain promises to yourself. When you can do this, you have more integrity with yourself and therefore, create a space where other people are more likely to hold you to it as well. Click here to read more »

A big part of what I talk about revolves around this idea of indifference.  Now, this can be quite tricky to apply if you don’t understand the basic premise behind it. I often see and observe men who have read a pick up book or have seen a cool 5 minute video on youtube and want to try out this whole “Act like I’m disinterested even though I really am”. And, usually it backfires in their face leaving the girl irritated, confused, and thinking “What is with that dude?” Heck, I’ve even seen my own brother try to do it with his current girlfriend, and I just shake my head and say to him, “She’ll see straight through it”. And, guess what? She usually does.

So, what is it about faking indifference that can go so terribly wrong? Click here to read more »

Problem: You really like this ONE girl, but for some reason you don’t know how to spark her interest. And, the harder you try, the more futile it appears to become. I get the same emails from a variety of different men all with the same fundamental problem, which I want to handle once and for all.

So, I ask you one question: Why this girl?

And, I’m sure that you will notice your mind start to spit out all sorts of different reasons. She is so funny, great, kind, attractive, different, etc. Some of you may find yourself drifting into some mental coma fantasy, dreaming about all the wonderful things you like and would like to do with this woman. Some of you may not even know what you like about this woman. In fact, all you may know is that you have the hots for her bad.

So, this leads me to the second problem I see. You like this girl and you have no freaking idea on how to get her interested in you. You don’t know how she feels. You don’t know how to spark her interest. You don’t know how to get her to breakup with her boyfriend and start dating you etc. Click here to read more »

A reader asks …
I am getting kind of confused with how to deal with this “sh*t testing.” It seems like it would be hard to find that balance between being an understanding and “not taking the sh*t from the girl.”

At the understanding side, someone could take that too far and end up being a door mat. But, on “not taking the sh*t from the girl” side, someone could take that too far and come across as insensitive of what the girl is going through or why she is reacting in that way. Thanks again,
Matt

Matt, I would say that you really need to assess the situation. I can’t give you a manual on all the situations a woman will engage in that will indicate that she is sh*t testing you. The action could be the same – yet the intention she has for it could be different. This is where you are really going to have to use your judgment.

It’s not a matter of, “Why is she really sh*t testing me” and more of a matter of, “How do I choose to respond to this?” If you always choose to respond with presence – you will win 100% of the time. Click here to read more »

When learning how to develop attraction with a woman, one of the first things that you are told is to learn to develop Alpha Male characteristics or become the ultimate alpha man.

And then usually the description you will here will be the antithesis of everything that a Beta Male represents. Therefore you hear that an Alpha Male is the exact opposite of a man that is wussy, approval seeking, predictable, needy, indecisive and uncertain about himself and the experiences around him.

So does that really mean that an Alpha Male is unpredictable, strongly dominant, a risk taker, outspoken and loves the centre of attention?

I think that there is a huge risk is assuming that an Alpha is just the pure opposite to a Beta male. Especially since there is only a small minority of people who could really be classified an ultra Alpha and ultra Beta. Majority of people are on a medium of this scale. The risk also comes from the fact that to truly create and maintain interest with a woman, one must display certain Alpha (dominance, leadership, assertiveness) and certain Beta characteristics (compassion, empathy, understanding, supportiveness). One must learn to appreciate both.

I was reading an article on askmen.com by Ross Jefferies who gave me inspiration from this post. Here is what he says … Click here to read more »