In 2008, I needed to start this blog. Because someone (and that someone was going to have to be me) needed to speak about the truth. Someone needed to tell the truth, no matter how blunt, how painful or how terrifying that would be. Read more »
A reader asks …
I am getting kind of confused with how to deal with this “sh*t testing.” It seems like it would be hard to find that balance between being an understanding and “not taking the sh*t from the girl.”
At the understanding side, someone could take that too far and end up being a door mat. But, on “not taking the sh*t from the girl” side, someone could take that too far and come across as insensitive of what the girl is going through or why she is reacting in that way. Thanks again, Matt
Matt, I would say that you really need to assess the situation. I can’t give you a manual on all the situations a woman will engage in that will indicate that she is sh*t testing you. The action could be the same – yet the intention she has for it could be different. This is where you are really going to have to use your judgment.
It’s not a matter of, “Why is she really sh*t testing me” and more of a matter of, “How do I choose to respond to this?” If you always choose to respond with presence – you will win 100% of the time. Click here to read more »
Have you ever dated a woman who just seemed a little off? Like she was too much effort? Like she was involved in WAY too much drama? Like she was always changing the way she felt about you? Like she was giving you mixed messages? I can see how dating and relating experiences like this can really confuse you. Not only that, I can see how it could really put you off women in general because of how easy it is to assume that all women are the same.
Some of you have just resigned yourself to the fact that woman are a species which does not WANT to be understood.
Or maybe you have at least thought about this at one point or another. Well, I’m here to shed some light on this (at times) mysterious issue. And it’s pretty easy to overcome once you have identified what the problem is. In most cases, women who are experiencing consistently high and low mood swings, denial and only slight degrees of self responsibility are more than likely to be emotionally immature.
This means a woman who is actually 35 years old can have the emotional maturity level of a 15 year old. I will also note that emotionally maturity is not entirely dependent on age. There are some younger women out there who are incredibly mature for their age and vice versa. There are a number of reasons why maturity does or does not develop but more on that later. First I want to help you guys really identify: what an emotionally immature woman looks like, what she does, and then why she is the way she is. Click here to read more »
Compliments, compliments, compliments. Do you give them? Do you withhold them? Do women even like them to begin with? Does complimenting a woman help her become more attracted to you? I know how incredibly confusing this question of whether to give compliments or whether to withhold them really is. Especially, since there are conflicting theories on their effectiveness in attracting women.
In light of this, my aim is to clear out the fog and to give you an woman’s perspective on the true meaning of compliments. My aim is to show you a much more effective, effortless, and natural way to create initial attraction; and most importantly, MAINTAIN that attraction with her.
What your typical woman will say about compliments.
Now, if you go around and ask your average/typical girl if she would be attracted to a guy who gives her plenty of compliments – she will literally clasp her hands together and in a high shrill voice say, “Of coooourse! I love them!” Then she will proceed to go out with her girlfriends to a nightclub, receive 10 or 20 compliments in the space of about 10 minutes and disregard all the men that are throwing all these lovely words at her.
So, here is the secret. Women like the “idea” of being showered in compliments rather than the “reality” of being showered in compliments. In fact, a woman being thrown compliments left, right, and center ONLY wants to do ONE thing. And, that is to take a shower! And, no, not the type of showering that you get to watch or participate in. Click here to read more »
When learning how to develop attraction with a woman, one of the first things that you are told is to learn to develop Alpha Male characteristics or become the ultimate alpha man.
And then usually the description you will here will be the antithesis of everything that a Beta Male represents. Therefore you hear that an Alpha Male is the exact opposite of a man that is wussy, approval seeking, predictable, needy, indecisive and uncertain about himself and the experiences around him.
So does that really mean that an Alpha Male is unpredictable, strongly dominant, a risk taker, outspoken and loves the centre of attention?
I think that there is a huge risk is assuming that an Alpha is just the pure opposite to a Beta male. Especially since there is only a small minority of people who could really be classified an ultra Alpha and ultra Beta. Majority of people are on a medium of this scale. The risk also comes from the fact that to truly create and maintain interest with a woman, one must display certain Alpha (dominance, leadership, assertiveness) and certain Beta characteristics (compassion, empathy, understanding, supportiveness). One must learn to appreciate both.
Myth: Once you rope a woman you are in – you don’t have to maintain her …
Ever had this experience. Walking up to a chick, somehow catching her attention and then not knowing what to say, how to act or how to move the conversation you are having with her into a “date” or a “lets catch up again some time again”. What about this. Going on a couple of dates with a girl, using some cocky funny humour, telling her some funny stories, charming her with your learned “alpha male characteristics” and then wondering … oh F**K what do I do next? Or oh F**K, I’ve used up all my material! Or oh F**K now she is interested in me, how do I keep this going?
Do you just keep doing the same stuff that you have always been doing? Can you just use the same material over and over again and hope that she isn’t like a normal human being who actually needs and desires some sense of variety and excitement?
I mean attracting a woman is going to be your biggest hurdle right? I mean once you have her attracted to her, its all smooth sailing. Its all hugs and kisses and minimal drama. Its all handled. Like you were the dog, she was the car and now you caught her … right?! Click here to read more »
At times women seem like the most confusing people in the world to understand. They don’t like mind games. They do like mind games. They don’t want a challenge. They do want a challenge. They do want you to show interest. They don’t want you to show interest. I answer all these questions and relive all sense of confusion, by getting to the root cause of problem and show you how you can truly attract women, by cultivating your own sense of identity.
No pick up lines. No mention about cocky funny humour. No pull and push techniques. I’m here to get you guys back to the basics. Because when you follow and master the basics, the rest will come naturally.
Here are the my 3 tips which you can use to help attract women, naturally, without all the mind games!
1) Don’t second guess yourself – there is perfection in every action and word you speak.
2) Pursue women that are equally interested in you – Divert your attention away from the women who are “not” interested in you and refocus on the ones that are receptive to your efforts.
3) Cultivate your assertiveness – you ability to make decisions quickly, to move and speak with intention all help in attracting women, effortlessly and without any mind games at all. Allow assertiveness to arise within you and spread to all other areas of your life.
For my subscribers, click here to see the video =)
The reason why I’m writing this post, is because I have a number of people always asking me, what they should do, what they should say and how they should act when “xyz” happens when it comes to dating, men and women.
Most of the time I’m hesitant in saying … “do this” or “do that” because the truth of the matter is, every situation is so very different. So trying to act in a predefined way, is probably the worse thing that you can possibly do! You want to know why?
Because you start to second guess yourself. You start to doubt yourself. You start to hesitate. You start to hold back. And you stop being able to access your personal power which makes you attractive and not to mention magnetic to everyone around you.
I can tell you right now, that its your hesitation and its your inability to act upon and listen to that inner voice within us all which ALWAYS know exactly what to do, what to say and how to act.
If there is anything I can teach you guys, is that you must cultivate and act upon your gut or intuitive feelings. Click here to read more »
About 2 years I created a videoabout “how to really attract women” – It continues to be one of my most popular dating you tube videos.
Since that time, I have come to some new distinctions which can really help men attract women. I’ve realised that it is not based on all the techniques, but rather its about developing a particular mindset about yourself and women, which in turn will magnetize women to you.
Here are the top three tips I discuss in this video
1) Be proactive and keep pushing for the next step. Resistance is part of the process.
2) Be transparent, you have a unique personality so use it! Get comfortable with who you are, its all you’ve got.
3) Blow as many women out of the water. Get it out of your system. Take the pressure off. Give yourself the approval that you are seeking.
In a nutshell. Hell NO!! Don’t worry I was one of those girls that dreamed, that preyed, that wished it was so. That meeting the right person would dissolve any issues of conflict, fighting or heaven forbid a staleness of passion for each other.
But I was slapped in the face by the cold hard truth. That to have a great dating relationship, to have a great long term relationship you are going to need a little more than a so called “ever lasting love” for each other.
Because you know what? Passion only ever lasts for so long and really nothing in this life lasts forever. We grow up, we mature, we get old and then we start shrinking. Not the pyramids, the oceans, nor your “good moods” can last forever. This is a simple truth of life.
So as we are riding the turbulent waves of life; good and bad, sad and happy, passionate and bored – the passion in our relationship can also waver. The truth is to have a great relationship – you are going to have to step up to the plate and be great at a lot of different things. Click here to read more »
When it comes to dating there are so many frustrated boys and girls out there a common statement is ” I just don’t care anymore”.
More or less these are people who are in a “single” rut as I would say. There is one instance where this statement could be a turning point in their dating lives depending on what they mean when they say this.
Ever heard of the cliche term, “you find someone when you are not looking for them” – well what does law of attraction have to say about that huh? So as I was thinking about this the other day, I came to a really awesome conclusion and now I’m going to share this with you.